If I’m Ever Afraid of Dying

Dear TEAMS,

I was talking with a family friend this week who has been through a trauma that has her afraid of dying.  It is all very logical—the trauma she experienced was terrible, and so I validated that it is a reasonable fear.  She doesn’t want to have the fear anymore, so she has received counseling concerning ways to help her not be afraid.  Thankfully, she was going to a Counselor who understands that we battle unseen forces more than even what is seen, so she is really coming against those powers of darkness.

But I wanted more for her.  I suggested she take a two-pronged approach, standing firm and fighting the fears but also getting a real picture of what Heaven is like and how desirable and wonderful it is to go there…that all the time we are in a win-win.  We are all the time in this wonderful life because we are redeemed and have the capacity to face the earth’s trials with God’s peace through trusting Him:  win.  If something happens that we die, though--no matter if it is sudden or lingering, brutal or peaceful—we go to Heaven:  win.  In other words, we have all this and Heaven, too.

Every so often, I have that brief moment of clarity which shows me the reality of Heaven.  It is so clear to me that for just a moment I see the eternal nature of Heaven, and the joy that is there—true joy, with pain not being part of the equation of life.  For just a glimpse, I see purpose and pure, abundant life…the life God intended from the start, the life that was there in Eden before the Lie, and the life we are destined to because we believe Jesus is Who He said He is.  

The lightness in my Inner Man for that moment is hard to describe.  It is the absence of fear; it is the absence of everything that keeps me grounded here.  And every time I get these peeks, it hits me again with a new revelation that where God is…well, that’s Reality.  Not the things we are so sure of here that we see, hear, taste, and feel.  It will be so good to be there.  I have been married to God for 30 years or so through Jesus’ sacrificial death and victory over the chains that held Mankind, and I have yet to see His face.  This God Who loved me so much that He saw my predilection to wander away from Him, even though we are not whole until we are reunited with Him, that He paid a price for me even before I was born.  This God Who is endless Comfort, endless Counselor, endless Creator, who saves my tears in a bottle and sings over me, Who sees when I go to bed or when I get up, Who is taken with me all the time and fawns over me out of the purest Love imaginable…I have never gotten to touch His face, or bow down before Him in a way that I could see Him when I arose.  I yearn to be with Him, and I yearn to see people I love again.

And it is so good to be here.  I must wait awhile until God calls me Home, and do the work He has purposed me to do here.  I love living with you and I love living with your father.  More than being blessed, I am aware of my blessings and what my position really is before God.  I am thankful.  I exist to do the King’s work, and I willingly do so, even when it costs me dearly.  The beautiful thing is, every time I feel I am losing a part of myself in service to Him through being a homemaker, I realize that what is replaced is true satisfaction of the real me.  

Yes, all this and Heaven, too.

Love,